Loneliness

            There was once a girl who was shy and quiet. She dressed conservatively in baggy clothing, as if to hide her self from the public eye. She was a girl who was slightly cynical and very worrisome. This girl had habit of analyzing people’s personalities and picking out things that she didn’t like about them. She would build a façade around her dark character to make friends, but carelessly drop it when too caught up in a conversation. And eventually, those friends would walk away from her and never come back. She’d always wondered what it was. Why couldn’t she have a best friend, or somebody that had her same interests and thoughts? She could pick out the people in the crowd that were like that— two doppelgangers of each other.  Oh, how she’d wished to have someone like that.

            One day, the girl discovered something. She’d been having a heated discussion with a boy about school. And she realized that this boy was easier to get a long with than her other friends. So she became his friend, and he, hers. And she thought, maybe if she’d expand her limits of friendship, she’d be happier. So she tried to do just that. And tried. And kept trying. Eventually, it got the point where she had her own kingdom of friends. Yet, at the same time, she’d built a wall around her heart, so as to bulwark any emotions that could hurt her. This girl was so focused on making friends that she’d forgotten exactly why she’d made them. And so, this girl grew to lack emotions.

            In all honesty, the girl had only made friends to feel a bit more like she belonged. She’d had no ulterior motive or specifically cruel reason behind her actions. However, these friends didn’t realize that. And so, like her companions before, they walked away and never came back.

            So the girl cried. She cried a river tears that became an ocean that would eventually drown her. But one day, a boy walked up to her while she was crying in the park across the street. He asked her why she was crying. And she realized that this boy was the same boy as the one she’d befriended so many years before. She told herself that she could trust him. And so she told him her story.

            He didn’t believe her.

            She drowned in her ocean of tears.